FIVE MISTAKES I MADE GROWING UP.
I have struggled to write this article for a while now, but, the more I shove it aside, the more it keeps popping up on my mind. So, here we go, let’s do this! Before we delve into it, if after reading this article, you feel the urge to judge or criticise me for some of them, feel free to do so, but, bear in mind, that I am writing this article from a place of GROWTH.
The first mistake I made was allowing anyone and everyone into my space and life in general. I did not rank my relationships. I just permitted everyone into my life and gave them the A spot… looking back to those years, I feel sorry for myself, as I lost lot more than I could ever have imagined.
Secondly, I overpoured and overshared. Knowing what I know now, that’s not happening anymore.
If it is not mutual, you won’t be hearing or receiving from me. I still render counseling services to friends and loved ones who need my help. But you know those sensitive informations, I’m careful as to how I spill. What this did to me was, I felt emotionally stressed up all the time and felt angry because I was giving and not receiving.
Thirdly, I got too angry and reacted too quickly. I used to say so much when I am angry, vex and vent. I was not careful with my words… looking back to those years, I wish I had handled somethings better. The funny thing was, I didn’t mean most of the things I do or the actions I took back then, I was only reacting to my immediate environment and reality; I wasn’t emotionally aware and intelligent. Now I know better.
The fourth mistake I made was trusting too quickly. I thought everyone was me. As long as I could not hurt you, I didn’t see why you would want to hurt me. I saw people as their smiles and not from their hearts. I was swayed by smiles and kindness… well, now I know that the most dangerous persons, are the ones who have the best demeanor and sometimes give the best help.
Sensitivity and discernment are the new approaches.
The fifth mistake I made was over explaining and always trying to defend myself. Let’s paint a scenario here.
Let’s say someone called me up to say another person said xyz about me, the me then, would call the person up to either clarify or defend myself. Smh, poor me😁. Such a waste of time and energy.
One quick question here, if someone I valued would say or believe a wrong narrative about me, then, I need to understand the unsaid words. They really don’t rate or value me. If you believed anything about me, confronted me about it, then, there is no need for clarification. Especially if you are not trying to be mature about the situation. My response will be for you to believe all you want.
I sincerely wish I had this mindset long before now, I guess I needed the lessons after all. Well, there is another way I handle such scenarios now, depending on the person and the value I place on them, if such things happen, say the person approaches me calmly, wisely and ready for a chitchat, I never hesitate. I give room for us to sort things out, hopefully at the end of the day, we could have a resolution, if not, we bade each other goodbye respectfully without having to feel resentment or animosity.
These are a few mistakes I made in my life and trust me when I say I have learned my lessons, and truthfully, I learned some of them the hard way.
I really do not know why I had to write this article today, but, I’m pretty sure you have taken a thing or two from this piece. GROWTH MADE ME DO THIS.
Have you made mistakes in life?
Would you like to share a few of them?
Which of my mistakes resonates with you?
Let us chat in the comments.
See you shortly.
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The 5th one oh. Over explaining myself to people.
I don’t do that anymore at all. It’s not worth it